Life

Holy Cow

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It’s been ages since I posted here last and that’s because I lost my login details. Yeah, I know, I’m an idiot. 

A lot has gone on since I last posted. There’s been terror attacks, my daughter ended up having a minor surgery, I’ve been working my backside off and pretending like I actually have a life (I don’t believe that last bit either).  

Anyway, I’ve found my details again so posting can continue! Well, after I’ve finished getting ready for work at least. I’m looking forward to Tuesday’s shift, it’s the first concert I’ll have worked and with a singer I quite like 😊

I’ve also discovered a thing called Happy Planner. This is seriously awesome and it’s really helping with my anxiety and depression so I’m going to be sharing (read: going bats sharing pictures) a little about it from here on in. 

I hope in my absence everyone has been doing well and I look forward to talking with you all again ❤️

daughter · Life · Work

Crazy Days

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When I last posted I was looking forward to peace and quiet. Did I get it? Nope. 

First my daughter got into a huge argument with her current (and hopefully soon to be ex) partner that led to him threatening to throw her out late at night so I had to deal with that. She’s okay now by the way. 

Second my body decided that I need to be sick from both ends for a day because, y’know, I wasn’t stressed enough to begin with. The best part? It didn’t hit me immediately, my body waited until I was out and about with Mister to suddenly decide that it hated me being actually productive. On the plus side, I got a couple of nice pictures while I was out in the sunshine 😊


Today though, while still not feeling too hot, I got to work a game with Castleford Tigers. I’m not sure who won because I was busy trying to stop children from going bats on the terrace I was working and concentrating on not throwing up. 

I’m honestly beginning to believe that the moment the UK gets some sunshine, all the kids decide that it’s the perfect moment to let all their energy and stupid out at once. Combine that with parents getting drunk because it’s sunny and that’s rare and it can lead to all sorts of shenanigans. 

Thankfully we managed to keep control for the most part and everyone got out safely and that’s all I can really ask for. 

So, apologies for such a huge delay between posts and I hope you’ve had a fabulous weekend!

daughter · Life

Getting frustrated

alonelyraven2 Comments

It’s been yet another long day and stress levels are through the roof. 

A lot of it is that I got hit with a direct debit that wasn’t due til next week which meant I was £20 short for food and have to figure a way to feed us until next week.

Another part is that I still have my daughter’s ex here and while he’s a lovely guy, I’m not used to having my space invaded for this long and it’s grating on me badly. I’m not gonna say anything to him because I invited him but it’s definitely not helping. 

Finally my daughter was here earlier and I watched her burst into tears at the thought of what her current partner would say to her for being later than she planned after running an errand for me. She’s made me promise I won’t say anything to him but that doesn’t mean I’m going to be anywhere near nice to him if he’s stupid enough to contact me. Is it bad I want him to contact me so I can unleash on him?

I’m ready to scream right now, anyone know any good calming music?

daughter · Life

A very long day

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Today my daughter came round and we spent a lot of time talking about what’s going on for her. It was exhausting, mainly because I’m trying to stop her repeating my history, but also because her ex-fiancé is staying with us for a couple of days and so I got to deal with all the emotional turmoil between them as well as what’s going on with her current partner. 

I have to say, her ex-fiancé is wonderful and not just because I like him as a person, but also because he was gentle with her and dragged out as much truth as she could stand to give and didn’t use it as a weapon. He really went up in my estimation for that one. 

We ended up all watching movies together which was nice and now she’s gone for the night. 

In between all the heavy emotional talking, we found my selfie stick that I’d been given as a freebie when I was at university. Yeah, we used it. #dontjudgeuswerebonkers

So now my daughter’s ex and Mister have gone in search of food and I’m chilling out on the bed. I swear, I don’t need any more drama, I’m already living in an Eastenders episode! 

I hope everyone’s had a good day and a good nights sleep 😊

daughter · Life

Took a lazy day

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So yesterday I took a lazy day and didn’t write because I was busy snuggled up with Mister watching movies. We got through the Taken trilogy, Paranormal Activity 2, The Magnificent Seven and Mamma Mia. 

It was a great day all round really and I enjoyed it. I’m glad I had that day for resting because today has gone a little bit pear-shaped. 

I’ve spent most of the day on the phone with my daughter trying to help her make an escape plan. 

Her current partner has turned out to be abusive. That’s me saying that, my daughter doesn’t quite accept that label yet but she sees the need to escape from him for a while. At least she sees the need to be away from him. 

He’s managed to cut her off from her friends, insults her, tells her he doesn’t trust her because she didn’t bother sharing every bit of information she possesses with him, has gone through her phone, changed the password on her Facebook so she can’t lock him out and he can see everything, tries to make her angry and then if he succeeds has a go at her for getting angry and has started constantly trying to flick her glasses off her face which I just know is her partner testing the physical boundaries. 

I’ve made her look at what he’s doing, truly look, and she agrees he’s not acting like someone who loves her even if she won’t label abuse. 

I’ll get her away from him if it’s the last thing I do. 

Wish me luck. 

Life

Mum’s House

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There’s something comforting about being at mum’s house. It’s one of the few places I can relax and be myself and not worry about anything. Plus, y’know, mum’s cooking is the best ever. 

Today was a little different in that I had to help her get around a lot because of her accident but she still insisted we have a proper Sunday dinner. Mum is scary when she’s mad and I ain’t arguing with free food so I helped her make it which was awesome because it was something to do together. 

She rested most of the rest of the time and I made her coffee so she loves me lots right now and dinner was gorgeous. Here, let me show you:


Feel free to drool because I did a few times when it was cooking!

Anyway, I’m home now and happy so I’m going to snuggle up with Mister and slowly fall asleep. 

Hope you’ve had a good weekend! 😊

Life

Party time!

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I’m sorry about the lack of posting yesterday, my ex-husband has a way of getting under my skin and winding me up to explosion point and I tend to pull back from everything when that happens so I don’t lose control. 

Anyway, today I’m off out for the first time in a very long time to a St. Patrick’s day party at a friend’s house and I’m really looking forward to it. I can’t get drunk because I have work tomorrow but still, it’s nice to get out of the house with friends and chill out a little. 

I’ve even put on makeup. 

That doesn’t sound like much until you realise the last time I wore makeup was for my Brother’s wedding last August so yeah, big deal for me. 

I’ll probably post a picture of me looking worse for wear tomorrow but until then, here’s one of me looking vaguely normal:


Happy weekend everyone!

daughter · Writing

Interruptions Abound

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I honestly think I’m going to go slightly batty. I’m trying to write and edit a story I’ve been working on for a while and it’s not going very well. When my daughter isn’t here, I can easily churcn out 5k a day in words if I need to and I can enjoy myself when doing it. Unfortunately, when she’s here, I barely manage past 500 for the entire day. You can guess how well that works for me when I’m running to a deadline.

I wouldn’t mind too much if people weren’t counting on me meeting that deadline but they are and I am.

Still, I’ve managed a respectable 2k today despite being constantly interrupted, having her borrow my laptop for ‘just one second, mum!’ and then being dragged into conversations about whether she should buy the blue shoes, the black ones, or the ones with batwings.

I love my daughter to bits but the last couple of days she’s driven me nuts and if she weren’t already 18, I’d consider selling her on eBay. I wouldn’t really, but you know what I mean.

With any luck I’ll be able to pump out another 2k words today and get somewhere near back on track. If I don’t I’m going to have a very bad time because I still need to prepare for Camp NaNoWriMo and I’m having a hard time imagining even being close to prepared. I’m going to be running from one deadline, to the Camp NaNo deadline with no break in between writing. Ugh, sucks to be me.

Wish me luck.